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Scotland to stay in the Union

The hopes of those Scots who cheered for independence was dashed yesterday as 55% of those who voted opted to stay in the Union. A record 85% of all eligible voters turned out for the referendum, making it a decisive victory for the ‘No’ camp. Scotland has a proud history, and it probably would have …Read More

Rush Limbaugh

Rush Limbaugh upset about the lost art of seduction

Ohio State University has recently published their new definition of sexual consent, and that seems to have really upset Limbaugh. In his view, all these rules make the entire process of romance a legal agreement. “[It] takes the romance out of everything,” said Limbaugh. “Seduction used to be an art. Now, of course, it’s prudish, …Read More

George on the operating 'table'

Goldfish gets lifesaving surgery

A goldfish, named George, in Australia received a lifesaving surgery to remove a tumor that was growing on its head. The operation went smoothly and George is now doing swimmingly! The owner of the fish who is quite attached to George paid $200 to have the 45-minute operation performed. The ‘doctor’ who performed the surgery …Read More


Obama to deploy 3,000 troops in response to Ebola crisis

As the Ebola outbreak worsens the U.S. plans to help African countries like Liberia fight the disease the best way it knows how—with troops. We have solved many problems across the world with our military, so why not eradicate Ebola with the finest men and women in uniform? “The goal here is to search American …Read More

Ted Cruz

Ted Cruz booed by anti-Semite Christian group

Senator Ted Cruz, the shining hope of the Tea Party, had to put his foot down, and walk out in mid-speech after some of the people in the audience booed him for his comments supporting Israel. The booing came after Senator Cruz said… “Christians have no greater ally than Israel.” Then the booing started. Senator …Read More

From The Sarcasmist
Calamities are of two kinds: misfortunes to ourselves, and good fortune to others.Ambrose Bierce
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