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Archive for November, 2009

The ACLU Demands Politically Correct Terminology

Written by The Sarcasmist on November 30, 2009 - Comments (35)

In its latest attempt to rid America of any type of political incorrectness, the ACLU has released the latest list of acceptable terms for use when referring to members of the American population. Ghosts: Corporeally Challenged Americans Vampires: Anemic Americans Werewolves: Anthropomorphic Americans Genies: Lamp-dwelling Americans Centaurs: Quadrapedic Americans Giants: Generously Proportioned Americans Cyclops: Monocular ... Read More

Church Construction Proposed In Saudi Arabia

Written by The Sarcasmist on November 30, 2009 - Comments (18)

A Christian group is accused of inciting violence and demonstrating religious insensitivity by proposing the building of a church in Saudi Arabia. Reports state that the most vociferous opponents of the new church being proposed is the group currently trying fighting for the right to build new minarets in Switzerland. It is appalling for Christians ... Read More

Landmines for Everyone!

Written by The Sarcasmist on November 25, 2009 - Comments (29)

President Obama, the peace monger, has just announced that the United States will not join its NATO allies and most other countries in formally banning landmines. “This administration undertook a policy review and we decided that our landmine policy remains in effect,” spokesman Ian Kelly told a briefing five days before a review conference in ... Read More

GOP: Earth Center of The Universe

Written by The Sarcasmist on November 24, 2009 - Comments (31)

The GOP launches a probe into the theory that the planet Earth is not the center of the Universe. A key GOP senator is questioning the validity of Copernicus’ heliocentric cosmology. The probe claims that the visual inspection of the movement of the Sun in the sky clearly demonstrates that the Sun is in fact ... Read More

Kenyan Government Dictating U.S. Policy

Written by The Sarcasmist on November 23, 2009 - Comments (10)

It has come to the Sarcasmist’s attention that the Kenyan government is dictating U.S. policy through their newly installed operative, Barack Obama. The Sarcasmist source revealed this disturbing information during a nighttime rendezvous at a Nairobi tea house. Fellow countrymen, our worst nightmare has come true. Lou Dobbs and all the other paranoid nut-jobs were ... Read More