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Archive for 2009

I Often Wonder How It Feels Like To Be Right

Written by The Sarcasmist on December 3, 2009 - Comments (20)

I often wonder how it feels to be right all the time, know about everything, and lecture everyone every chance I got. It would be such a tremendously fulfilling life to pick on every inconsistency that doesn’t match up with my own reality or my misinformed mind. How wonderful it would be to complain about ... Read More

Obama Infected by the Same Virus as President Bush?

Written by The Sarcasmist on December 2, 2009 - Comments (39)

In his announcement about the war in Afghanistan, Obama said that “Afghanistan will be a democratic country, whether its people want it or not.” The White House contends that if the U.S. can bring democracy, peace and stability to one middle-eastern country (Iraq), there is no reason why it shouldn’t do the same for other ... Read More

Large Hadron Gives Scientists Large Hard-on

Written by The Sarcasmist on December 1, 2009 - Comments (15)

In an unexpected turn of events, the successful power-up of the Large Hadron Collider has made it something more than just a toy that is designed to unlock the mysteries of the Universe. The proton beams generated by the Collider have a very surprising effect. All the scientists working on the Collider as it powered ... Read More

The ACLU Demands Politically Correct Terminology

Written by The Sarcasmist on November 30, 2009 - Comments (35)

In its latest attempt to rid America of any type of political incorrectness, the ACLU has released the latest list of acceptable terms for use when referring to members of the American population. Ghosts: Corporeally Challenged Americans Vampires: Anemic Americans Werewolves: Anthropomorphic Americans Genies: Lamp-dwelling Americans Centaurs: Quadrapedic Americans Giants: Generously Proportioned Americans Cyclops: Monocular ... Read More

Church Construction Proposed In Saudi Arabia

Written by The Sarcasmist on November 30, 2009 - Comments (18)

A Christian group is accused of inciting violence and demonstrating religious insensitivity by proposing the building of a church in Saudi Arabia. Reports state that the most vociferous opponents of the new church being proposed is the group currently trying fighting for the right to build new minarets in Switzerland. It is appalling for Christians ... Read More