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Watch TV. Die early.

Written by The Sarcasmist on August 16, 2011 - Comments (1)

Now they’ve done it! Researchers who are bent on finding a problem with everything that humanity finds enjoyable have finally gone too far in their quest for ‘helping’ humanity.

A new study has found that watching too much television may shorten your lifespan. Researchers in Australia have concluded that people who watched over six hours of television per day, lived (on average) almost five years less than people who didn’t watch television.

The study found that for every hour of television viewing, after the age of 25, the viewer’s lifespan was shortened by 22 minutes. This new discovery is certainly a revelation. All those people who are running on treadmills at the gym and watching television, to make the mind-numbing exercise bearable, are cancelling out all the benefits of exercise by subjecting their bodies to the horrors of TV.

It should at least be of some consolation to most TV viewers that watching too much television may shorten their lifespan, but it’ll balance that out by widening their clothes size.

If you’d like to read a more informative article about the study, you can find it here.

One Comment

  1. I’m just wondering how much shorter the life span is for the researchers who do research bent on finding a problem with everything that humanity finds enjoyable is……

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