Top 10 Sarcastic Family Guy Quotes
10. “Aw, the South! Isn’t that the place where the black guys are lazy, and the white guys are just as lazy, but they’re mad at the black guys for being so lazy.” -Peter Griffin
9. “Hey, Mother! I come bearing a gift. I’ll give you a hint: it’s in my diaper, and it’s not a toaster.” -Stewie Griffin
8. Meg: Everybody! Guess what I am?
Stewie: Hmm, the end result of a drunken back seat grope-fest and a broken prophylactic?
7. “I bet you lost your virginity to a mechanical bull.” -Stewie Griffin
6. “Wow Peter that’s a book isn’t it? That’s the first time I’ve seen you reading something that didn’t later turn out to be a sandwich.” -Brian Griffin
5. “Hey will you take me down to Baby Gap? I want to dress like a small douche.” -Stewie Griffin
4. Peter: Boy Quagmire, I’m really sorry they fired ya. I feel like this is partially my fault.
Quagmire: No Peter, it’s perfectly normal to siphon jet fuel from an active runway with the intention of flying a pickup truck.
3. Brian: I can’t believe our society values the life of a dog less than a human. It’s infuriating.
Stewie: That is infuriating. Maybe you should go bark at a tree and then chew on your balls for an hour.
2. Lois: Oh, I haven’t been on a college campus in years. Everything seems so different.
Stewie: Really? Perhaps if you laid on your back with your ankles behind your ears that would ring a few bells.
1. Lois: Stewie, look what Mommy made for dessert.
Stewie: Ooh, Jell-O. How exotic! I feel like I’m on the deck of the QE2.