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It’s not solylent green, it’s worse!

Written by The Sarcasmist on June 17, 2011 - Comments (13)

It's pootastic!

A Japanese scientist, Mitsuyuki Ikeda, working at the Environmental Assessment Center in Okayama, has developed a type of artificial meat derived from human waste. The new ‘meat’ consists of 63% proteins, 25% carbohydrates, 3% lipids, and 9% minerals. This new creation, called “sewage mud” is believed to one day be available for sale as an alternative to the increasingly expensive process needed to produce and distribute real meat.

You may think that this is crazy, but all the bacteria present in poo makes it a great replacement for meat. Don’t worry, the bacteria are killed off by heat (as the video explains). Dr. Ikeda explains that once the process is perfected and the product can be brought to market, the cost will be comparable to real meat.

This is a great scientific advancement because not only will it reduce the need for killing all those cows and transporting them, but it can potentially helps eliminate the digestion process since the ‘meat’ is already digested. And finally, vegetarians will not have to suffer the bland taste of vegi-burgers and can replace it with the pungent and predigested poo patty.


Comments

  1. Name Required

    Well at least this way we will not be able to say we did not know it was crap before we ate it.

    Bonus: This brings the term corophagia to the masses.

  2. Suck My Phonics

    wow between solylent green and corophagia maybe some jap scientist should invent something that like makes a squiggly red line underneath words when you spell them wron–ohhhh yeah…

  3. Just what we needed… A replacement for sh** on a shingle

  4. soyled pants

    I got the reference because my boss pinned me down and made me watch the movie.

    SOYLENT GREEN IS MADE OF!!!!….poo?

    Speaking as a Coprophologist, I can say with great excitement that is will be a wonderful addition to our everyday diet.

    ..or maybe I’m being f-ing sarcastic.

  5. Carl Schmidt

    Can we please f-ing nuke Japan completely this time so we don’t enter this realm?

  6. This man should be tortured to death over the space of a decade with all his friends and family made to watch.

  7. Will eating shit be carbon neutral?

  8. Question….do we use toilet paper or napkins when we eat this poo~burger?

  9. Phil shakespeare

    It already exists, it’s called burger king!

  10. Make me wet...

    Doner Kebab anyone?? Maybe nuking the people who nuked Japan would be a better option, it’s your fault you idiots!!

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